SuperBen

I was thinking today that being in the hospital is sort of like finals week.  You feel isolated from the rest of the world and consumed by the whole thing.  You have to devote all of your time and energy on this one task, pretty much putting everything else in life on hold.  The difference in the hospital, is that there is no end date and you never quite know when a hospital stay will happen.  But I also suppose there is no "grade" either so you can keep trying again until you get it the way you want it. 

Ellie's sodium is back down from yesterday, although still slightly elevated.  We have increased her steroids to help her feel more wakeful and will be slooowly tapering her back down over the next few weeks.  Talk is of going home tomorrow (assuming no drastic changes today). 

Ben has been struggling a bit the last few days.  I think maybe he is just exhausted and missing us.  Right now, I think he is really looking forward to all of us being together again at home, because when we are in the hospital it is rare that all of us are together.  He is so good at picking up on how we are feeling and acting that out or trying to make us feel better.  I imagine it has been somewhat exhausting for him as Thom & I have not been our usual perky selves much of the time.  I know at least for me, I have been up and down emotionally, sometimes so exhausted the thought of making him another meal and then cleaning it  up makes me sigh heavily.  I was also thinking of how challenging it must be for him to be in Ellie's room right now when we are constantly asking him to be quiet, sit down, don't jump in that drawer, etc.  Plus his whole life is rearranged for his sister.  I feels so fortunate that typically he just rolls with it, but I know that there are times he wishes he could do more of what he wants to do.  As so many 5-year-olds, he wants to be the "good guy", he just thrives on helping out.  What an unexpected change to suddenly feel like the "bad guy", at least in the hospital room.  We talk a lot about good guys/bad guys lately because so many of the books and movies geared towards his age have them.  He wonders why anyone would want to be a bad guy.  It just does not make any sense to him.  He has definately been a super hero throughout this year of hospital stays!