Miracle cures

Last week, both my children experienced colds--big time.  Ellie felt the worst on Monday, felt better Tuesday but then woke up Wednesday with laryngitis.  Thursday morning, Ellie still was whispering to me, but  seemed to be feeling a bit better energy-wise.  Thom and I debated whether or not to send her to school.  Now when I was a youngster, we went to school unless we were lying on death's doorstep.  If you could become verticle, you were on that bus heading towards school.  With all of the flus and what-not these days, there are all kinds of rules about when to have your child go back to school and when to keep them home to try to decrease spreading infection.  On Thursday afternoon, Stephanie, Ellie's school nurse called to see how Ellie was doing.  I explained the situation and how bad she still sounded, how she wasn't speaking.  When suddenly, Ellie yells down the stairs (for the first time in two days!!) "WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO ON THE PHONE??"  So shocked was I that I ran to the furthest point in the house away from the stairs.  I felt like I was "busted", as if we had been playing hookie and not even realized it.  I felt as if I had just made up the whole thing up, did Ellie really have a sore throat in the morning or had I made that up? 

An alternate ending:  When I shared this story with Cynthia, she  thought it would have been even better had I said to the nurse, "WOW!!  You just healed her!  And over the phone!  You are some GREAT nurse!!"

Entertainment brought to you by our local Blockbuster

[caption id="attachment_2227" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="Ellie when we first moved to Madison at 4 years old."][/caption]

Often on the weekends, Ellie and I will walk to our local blockbuster store, which according to our pedometer is 2.44 miles round trip.  When we arrived at Blockbuster recently, Ellie asked me if she could walk around.  I said, "Sure" as we were the only ones in the store so I knew she wouldn't get lost in the crowd.  Well, at one point, I looked up from my browsing to see Ellie walking quickly through the store.  I thought perhaps she was looking for me.  So I hollered, "Ellie, I am over here!"  Ellie responded that she knew and continued on her brisk walk.  You see when I heard her say, "walk around the store", I immediately thought she meant, "browsing" the children's movie section.  What Ellie meant was literally "walk around the store" which is exactly what she was doing. 

Last weekend Ellie and I again went on a walking date to our local blockbuster to exchange movies.  While we were there, Ellie attempted to converse with the woman behind the counter.  When Ellie tried to tell the woman some of her words and ideas, the woman immediately told Ellie that her words were in fact not "real" words, they were only her own made up words.  Geez Louise, I thought to myself, do you also like to tell children there is no Santa Claus?  Straighten them out on the tooth fairy too.  Who needs all that meddlesome creativity and imagination anyway?  And I wondered if perhaps we should switch to Netflix.  Seriously, making up words is one of Ellie's greatest joys in life and I get it that not everyone appreciates that but for crying out loud I did not think she needed to be "fixed" of this at Blockbuster.  (As you can tell, I am still peeved about the incident, which is pretty silly seeing as how Ellie took no offense in the first place and does not recall talking to this woman in the second.) 

Well last weekend I mustered up my courage and we took our trek to Blockbuster and encountered another Blockbuster employee behind the counter.  Ellie asked what her name was and immediately wanted to tell the woman how she changed her name to rhyme with her good friend Kelly.  The woman listened patiently, then she told Ellie how when she was growing up she had friends and they too wanted their names to rhyme.  She totally got the story, but more importantly she TRIED to get the story and relate it to what Ellie was saying.   It did not take any longer than crushing a little girl's dream, and we all left happier for the encounter.  Boy oh boy do I prefer friendly and I have gotten particularly used to friendly living in Madison for 5 years now.

Peanut peanut butter

Shelly is the one and only friend that I still have from high school AND college.  Amazing.  (I would call her my "oldest" friend, but when I called another friend "old" she requested that I not use that word in conjunction with her name.  Thus I have learned from Debbie Martin not to use the word "oldest friend" as it has a double meaning that may not be flattering to the friend in question).  The first memory that popped into my mind was Shelly's mom who passed away recently (is it recently or is it years now?), how when I decided I was not a meat eater, she was convinced that I just had not been eating the good meats that were out there.  She would say to me, "But this is REALLY good sausage."  Her mother was determined to be the one to turn me back onto meat, I appreciated her attempts to feed me. 

In college, Shel and I roomed together our freshman year and shared our love of Hall & Oats, peanut butter, and many trips to the local TCBY (for what else but peanut butter yogurt). 

Shelly now lives in St. Louis with her husband and 3 beautiful daughters.  I love watching Shelly with her daughters because one or all three of them are constantly touching her or crawling on top of her or sitting on her lap or holding her hands.  It's like they just cannot get enough of her.  The time before our last visit, Ellie wanted to read a book and Shelly immediately sat down with Ellie and her 3 girls and began to read.  When we visit, Shelly always has a spread like you wouldn't believe, carrying on her mother's tradition of feeding me (or at least attempting to).  I would say, Shelly and Jeff are some of the finest hosts that I know.   When you are in their home it just seems as if they are truly happy to have you.  Because of this, every time we are in the St. Louis area we make plans to see them.  During one visit,  I started eating this wonderful quiche, I just could not get enough of it, so yummy was it.  When I asked about it, the whole room got quiet while Jeff & Shel sort of had a quizzical look on their faces.  Then, as comprehension appeared on Shelly's face, she said, "Oh you mean the DIP?"  Oops.  Then, of course, I had to go back and try it as a dip. 

When we went to visit them last summer, it was fanfreakintastic.  Shelly allowed Ellie (hey they even rhyme!) to follow her around the house while she prepared a SPREAD (even though I made the visit at a time when she would not feel obligated to cook for us!)  Shelly prepared the infamous dip that I had so enjoyed the previous time and her daughter, Anna, recalled that Ellie loved chips.  Then once she had everything prepared, Ellie sat down beside Shelly and we all sat around and chit chatted while the rest of the kids sat on the floor and played.  It was unbelievably amazing because so many times Ellie gets lost if there is a crowd of people, feeling as if she is excluded.  But in this situation, somehow, magically we all felt included and loved.  It was spectacular.  I mean before this incident it barely felt possible that there would be a situation where we could actually sit with another family and have an enjoyable conversation, one where I did not feel as if I constantly needed to assist Ellie in taking turns or assist her in feeling included or figure out when there was a pause so she might share her story.  It was like a breath of fresh air to be able to just sit back and relax and connect with the people around us while Ellie was also feeling connected and loved.  So often in these situations I can see the person Ellie is talking with begin to lose interest in talking with her.  Shelly never got to that point, she just stayed connected the whole time.  We ended up staying much longer than I ever anticipated because it was just so magically delicious.  My hope is that some day I will make guests in my home feel as loved and welcome as Shelly did last July.

Happy Birthday, Shel, we are all so happy that you and your family are in our lives!

And now we return to yet another library story...

[caption id="attachment_2207" align="alignright" width="300" caption="Ellie and I not at the library."][/caption]

I know what you are thinking, "For crying out loud!  What could have possibly happened at the library THIS time??"  More plants knocked down?  Another hurt child?  Ruined books?  What could it be??"  (See "Another Not So Pretty Do-Over Story")

As you may or may not know I have been challenged for many years with a librarian phobia.  (I may be repeating myself here, if I am, feel free to skim this part, I'll never know the differance.)  It all started in college when I worked at a library one summer and one of the librarians would follow me around as I worked correcting my many mistakes.  Until finally I could not take it anymore and quit.  Then in La Grange one of the librarians asked Ellie if she "had something wrong with her" when she got upset to which, I responded by sending a highly charged e-mail.  I mean seriously, would you ever ask that of an adult patron?  Surprisingly, the next time we came to the library this same librarian was ultra nice to us.  That kind of nice where there is an "I'm sorry" planted inside.  Weird huh?  Oh and then there was another time that Ellie threw up at the library and Jenny and I tried to see if we could get some help cleaning it up to no avail.  Well, it seems that the tide has turned my friends.  In a HUGE way.  Here are my examples.

[caption id="attachment_2208" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="Love of books started early for Ellie. Beginning when she would not crawl on all fours b/c she could not hold books unless she sat and scooted instead."][/caption]

It all began at the Madison Main Branch when Ellie & I were checking out (Ben was holding the gate open for library patrons) and Ellie began to tell the librarian how much we love books and how much we love the library.  The two librarians checking us out were thrilled.  They told Ellie that they wished they had a television camera so they could make a commercial out of her comments.  HELLO.  I cannot tell you how many many times in the past Ellie has said this to a librarian only to either be ignored or responded to with a noncommittal, "Hmm."  Discouraging any further discussion.

[caption id="attachment_2211" align="alignright" width="300" caption="More books to love..."][/caption]

But wait, there's MORE.  At our local library, recently, Ellie & I arrived at the front desk.  Ellie told the librarian checking us out that we likove (like + love) the library.  To which the librarian, laughing, told Ellie that they loved us for loving the library.   About knocked me over.

Finally, again at our local branch, one day Ellie began to tell the librarian how she likoved to make up words.  To which the librarian responded by saying how he loved words and any time she wanted to teach him new words he would be happy to learn them.  And on a subsequent visit, this same librarian told Ben how

[caption id="attachment_2212" align="alignright" width="300" caption="More reading in bed..."][/caption]

much he too loved dinosaurs when he was growing up.  Chatty and friendly at the LIBRARY??  It is totally blowing my mind, this complete turn of events.  It seems that we have arrived into a parallel universe where librarians are in fact friendly and helpful.  Seriously.  Now if everyone would start singing and dancing, like that scene in Music Man at the library (Marian the Librarian) this would in fact be the perfect world I've dreamed of.  That and maybe pink fancy cupcakes to replenish ourselves after all the dancing and singing.

Oprah!

My brother Kip is a HUGE Oprah fan, he records the show every day.  When I told him that I was invited to be in the audience by my super friend Betsy C.  he was dumbfounded.  He has tried for years and years to get tickets to no avail.  And I mean for crying out loud he works in the movie biz, how did I get tickets first?  When I explained the dress I was going to wear to him, he paused.  One of those pregnant pauses where you can feel the other person thinking, "Oh NO, you are NOT going to wear THAT?"  But instead of feeling like the dress was not the appropriate choice, instead I thought, I just didn't explain the dress correctly because this dress is perfect.  It would be what Oprah would want.  For sure.   

One of the things I was most excited about was having the opportunity to hang out with Betsy for the afternoon something that happens far less than I would like.  It was also amazing how the few days before the event, everything just rolled right off me.  Anything that on another day might have caused me to go into "Oh boy, I've really messed up.  I'm a bad mom."  Made me think instead, "I'm going to OPRAH!!"  It was an outstanding feeling not to take things so personally, but to instead just know that all was well and would indeed work itself out whether I felt bad about it or felt good about something else.  And it was fabulous to have something other than medical things to phone about. 

We discovered that being in the Oprah audience is a whole lot like being an extra in a movie--a LOT of waiting around.  You are herded from one line to the next and then into a large waiting area.  It is really really well organized and the staff, for the most part, was friendly and helpful.  As we were waiting in our first line, it sort of felt like entering another country.  The whole experience was enhanced by the airport like security,  we went through the metal detectors and had our bags searched.  Then we waited and waited and waited in the upstairs waiting area that had lots of HUGE pictures of Oprah with various guests.  We had no idea how long we waited because our phones had been confiscated and who wears a watch anymore? (No offense if you are in fact wearing a watch right now.)  I started out wearing my Tiara from my coaching program because I really felt like Oprah would get the whole Tiara thing.  Some of the security guards really liked it and would call me "your highness" as they ushered us through.  I sorta lost my nerve after I signed a waiver saying that I would not be advertising anything on the show.  I liked my sister's response to the whole thing, "You wore it at the perfect time."  Loved the feeling of confidence that statement made. 

Finally, they started calling the people to sit in the front rows (guests and guests of the guests plus some special audience members.) 
We were number 274, so we were the last group to be seated.  One of the most exciting parts was moving from the waiting area to this dimly lighted hallway to the studio, that was when the excitement was really building for me.  Then suddenly we were there and looking for seats.  A woman came out and interacted with the audience for maybe a good half hour, finding out who was there with their moms, who had an anniversary, etc.  The other thing that I liked the most was the feeling of the audience, it was like everyone was cheering and excited for everyone else there.  The energy and excitement in the room was palpable.  Then, the camera people started moving around and suddenly it was time for Oprah to make her appearance.  The thing Betsy & I noticed was how she walked out, just like a woman ready to do her job.  Of course the entire audience stood when she came out and clapped.  Oprah immediately said "I love you all that much too, I really do."  And you really believed her, feeling the love in the room.  She did seem shorter than I expected and it seemed like she was having a really hard time walking in her extremely high heels.  The set up on stage was a table with high backed chairs.  The stage actually rose once Oprah sat down.  Everything felt much more orchestrated than when watching it at home.  Oprah came read the prompts, showed a video, had a couple of different guests join her on stage.  At the end of the taping Oprah wanted to re-do the ending because she wanted one of the guests to be in the closing shots.  Apparently one of the crew did not want to re-shoot it and Oprah told him (and the audience) you know it is the name "Oprah" on the show so  let's do it again.  Yes it was a bit snotty, but what I liked about it was that it was REAL, she was having a moment of frustration with a co-worker like all of us do.  Then we re-did one other segment where her mic was covered by a book (that we received called Half the Sky).  Then it was over and we went back outta Oprah land into Chicagoland. 

 The show will be aired on OCTOBER 1.  I do not think you will see me in the audience, but it was a terrific topic nonetheless.

Perfection

[caption id="attachment_2185" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="Yet another funny face Ben photo, taken by none other than Ben himself."][/caption]

Friday was another bright blue skies, warm autumn afternoon.  As we began to walk Ellie home from school, Ben stated that he wanted to walk right beside his "best sister".  He even wanted to hold her hand.  When Ellie protested the hand-holding, Ben insisted that they do so when crossing the street.  Ellie kept sighing and uttering, "He is so adorable!"  Ben made great effort to walk right beside Ellie, stopping when she stopped to sing a little song.  Then continuing at a slower pace than his usual jog/run home, even inventing a special step that would keep him in line with his best sister.  (He sort of made his legs look like a horse to do so.) And, of course, I was his best mommy and Thom was, you guessed it, his best daddy.  It was one of those parenting moments where I felt the total love and appreciation for my children and who they have become and simultaneously felt all the years of wanting my children to understand and love one another come to fruition.  I just wanted to bottle the moment up and carry it with me always.  Amazing it was.   Utter perfection.

St. Vinny's

[caption id="attachment_2173" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="How fabulappy (fabulous + happy) I am to go to St. Vinny's (earrings are in fact a purchase from the aforementioned store.)"][/caption]

Another one of my favorite neighborhood haunts is, of course, the legendary St. Vincent De Paul Thrift Store.  Many of you are quite familiar with this store, as I will use any excuse to peruse possible, including but not limited to, a bike sale (purchased a radio flyer bicycle w/ training wheels for $5) an end of season sale, a visiting guest who needs a book, sweatshirt, new wardrobe...When I walk into a thrift store I have that sudden rush of feeling that I can have anything in the store.  I feel like waving a 20 around and announcing, "I'll take it all!"  Ben has begun to enjoy this feeling and asks quite often for a visit to St. Vinny's for a look at their toy aisle (he is allowed to spend a whopping dollar and usually ends up w/ several toys for that amount.)  My favorite spot, besides the magnificent, well-organized and

[caption id="attachment_2180" align="alignright" width="225" caption="How fabulappy Ben feels when he gets himself a dollars worth of toys."][/caption]

extremely reasonably priced books, is the $1 rack.  I have found so many spectacular tops, crazy pants, skirts on this rack.   That's not even to mention the earrings for $2-4.  I love it when I find a person who is just as excited about me finding something there at the dollar rack (you know who you are.)  I am in fact the person that Ellen Degeneres joked about one day on her show that some people actually brag about how cheap their clothes are rather than how expensive.  That's me.  Cheap bragger.

Last week (or was it the week before?)  Ben & I were perusing the store.  When we went to check out, the female checker (Ben & Ellie's favorite kind of checker) looked disappointed.  She inquired if Ellie was at school.  I said that yes she was.  It sort of

[caption id="attachment_2177" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="How namused (not + amused) Ellie feels to find herself in St. Vinny's with 2 browsers (the opposite of a fast shopper such as herself)."][/caption]

caught me off guard as I always feel somewhat invisible in the store.  The attempts I have made to hold conversations with some of the employees have been unsuccessful, simply eliciting a mumbled "huh" to get me to NOT share any more information with the person.  Of course not all the employees are like this, but I suppose those are the ones that have left me feeling somewhat invisible and less chatty during check-outs.  But I digress.  The checker then went on to say how impressed she was with how polite Ellie is, always saying her "pleases and thank yous and your welcomes."  She said this was quite a contrast to some of the other

[caption id="attachment_2175" align="alignright" width="300" caption="How fabulappy Thom is when we save money!"][/caption]

young customers she sees (fortunately, she did not look pointedly at our Ben!)  It was quite a boost to have such high praise for sweet Ellie in an environment where I don't often think anyone there will remember us.  And it was quite a shock too because I had just written my "tolerating" blogs and here was yet another person in the position of appreciating all of the wonderful things about Ellie.