What I like about you...

[caption id="attachment_144" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="Thommy boy"][/caption]

 I just finished reading a book by Calvin Trillin entitled, About Alice.  This book is a love letter written by Calvin to his wife who had recently passed away.  I hoped as I read this utterly beautiful book that his wife knew when she was alive how much she was loved.  I decided a while ago that if there was something I appreciated about those in my life, I wasn't going to wait until they were dead to tell them.  Now that I have written what I like best about my children, it would be remiss of me not to mention what I adore about my wonderful husband. (Plus, today is his birthday so I am contractually obligated to be nice.) 

Thom & I met at a small college in the middle of Missouri in 1999.  After we became best friends, I remember hearing a radio announcer in Kirksville (where we went to college) say, "Debbie Kennedy" as the winner of some contest.  I immediately knew that someday I too would be a "Debi Kennedy" (at the time I was a Debi Wolf).  

1.  History 

We have a history.  It is so wonderful to live with someone with whom I have a history.  My mom has been married 5 times, on the plus side it provided some wonderfully varied examples of fatherhood and marriage.  The qualities that I liked the most in those men--the love, affection, sense of humor, steadfastness--are all found in Thom. 

On the other hand, when I was growing up there was lot of moving around from family to family, and I never felt as if I truly belonged to any of them.  What I most wanted at that time, was a family, one family, that felt like my own.  Thom has helped me to realize this dream of creating a family even better than I ever could have imagined.  

2.  My best friend.

When something exciting or not so exciting happens, Thom is the first person I want to tell.  And I know because I have his children with me, he will always take my call.  Because we do have a history together, it makes it easy to jump right into a conversation, I don't have to backtrack and get him up to date.  One of the things I first appreciated about Thom was his great listening skills, because as you can probably surmise, I can talk and talk and talk...

3.  His sense of humor.

Thom is not afraid to be completely goofy.  He can see the humor in things.  I just don't think I could be with someone who didn't see how hilarious all of this is (most of the time, unless I say it is not hilarious and then it is not.)  While giving birth, Thom told me that the hardest times for him were the transition periods, when I would suddenly, become totally and completely serious.

[caption id="attachment_154" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="Ben, Thom, Ellie wait for a ferry boat."][/caption]

4.  His fatherdom. 

He is the best father that I have ever met.  I feel so fortunate that Ellie & Ben will grow up with a Dad who loves to play and laugh and enjoys spending time with them.  

When he comes home from work, he throws himself onto the floor and rolls around with Ben.  He is the Dad at the park who is running around playing with all the kids.   He says goofy things to make Ellie laugh.

He earned the title, Dr. Daddy, several years ago when Ellie was undergoing chemotherapy and he went to every single appointment with her.  (He also went to every single prenatal appointment.)  Dr. Daddy is responsible for all of the icky stuff, like changing the g-tube button every few months and giving injections.  Every morning Dr. Daddy sets out on the counter all of Ellie's many medications, labeled as to when I should give her which medication.  Then, he makes sure to get up each morning and give her her 6 am medication and gives her her 11pm dose.  As if that weren't enough, he wakes up every night whenever Ellie needs anything.  He is her go-to-guy in the middle of the night.  And, most amazingly, he typically isn't grumpy about the whole thing.  I mean I get grumpy just thinking about it. 

5.  He's handy.

Not only is Thom handy, but he actually cooks well and cleans better than I do.  Yep, he is the total package.   

6.  Secret Keeper

If you tell Thom your biggest utmost secret, he will not under any circumstances tell it.  When he puts something into the vault it is locked away for good, partially because he will forget what you have told him very quickly after you tell him.

7.  Always growing.

He's always into some newfangled thing.  I love that the two of us continue to grow and learn and expand upon this life journey. 

[caption id="attachment_147" align="alignright" width="300" caption="Baby Ben"][/caption]

8.  Courage.

Thom is one of the most courageous people I know.  When I was pregnant with Ben, we decided to have the baby at home, unassisted.  We had a lot of family members and friends and even strangers expressing concern over this choice.  Never once did Thom doubt that we could do it.  He was so excited to be a part of every aspect of Ben's birth. 

9.  Supportive

As most of you know, when Ellie was undergoing chemotherapy, Thom went about getting The Angry Monster Book published.  He knew that I was most unhappy about Ellie being put through chemo when the possibility of it actually helping were slim.  He thought seeing my book in print would give me something to look forward to when I was feeling great despair.

More recently, when my sister began suggesting that I write a blog, Thom went ahead and set up the blogsite you are reading from, so all I would have to do was start typing.  He jumps in and does these things without making me feel as if I owe him anything.

Although I could go on and on and on, I'd best not, because Thom stops reading if I go over 1000 words...