Angels Angels Everywhere

Much easier getting in than out!

Lotta, Zibbi and I attended Ben's Valentine's Day Party. We were in charge of games. What shocked me about the whole party was how incredibly unhappy Ben was in his classroom. Never have I witnessed Ben so sullen and awkward.  It was painful.

Near the beginning of the school year, Zibbi, Lotta and I participated in the Marquette Mile, a fund raiser where the entire school walks together.  It was the last school event Ellie ever participated in.  When Ben's class lined up outside for the group photo, Ben was standing beside his teacher.  Suddenly he was knocked out of this spot, and I watched as he frantically attempted to find a spot for himself.  I waved him over beside me and gave him a big (hopefully) reassuring hug.  What bothered me later as I pondered the scenario was the possibility that Ben was spending his days feeling that out of place and uncomfortable and, well, just frantic.

All of this is such a contrast to Ben's experience in 1st and 2nd grade when he was absolutely blossoming.  His teachers continually told me how well liked he was, what an astounding writer he is, how caring and kind he is.  The time I presented The Angry Monster Book to the class, Ben was the guy completely engaged, raising his hand.  Practically glowing.  His teachers were magnificent, spending a full month teaching kindness.  The fit for him was perfect, and I knew even on those days when I was not at my best, Ben would have spent the majority of his day feeling happy and confident, surrounded by love and acceptance.

This whole thing has really made me up my game, as I realize now how challenging each day at school is for him, I realized how our love and kindness and acceptance is even more critical.  I mean on the one hand I am happy he has family support where some other students might not.  On the other hand, as a mamma bear, I don't want him slogging through this mess!!

Monday following V day, I made an appointment with the principal (yes I went straight to the top!  Reminded me of the times "crazy Momma" reared her head at the hospital to get things done.)  She is a fabulous principal and told me at one point during the meeting how she just loved our family (how could I not think her fabulous after that comment?).  I felt much reassured that Ben would be receiving some additional during his school day.  

As I approached Ben's classroom for pick up, a woman approached me saying, "Hi!" as if she knew me.  Unfortunately, this wange thing has happened to my memory following my fourth born.  I now often encounter people I have absolutely no memory of meeting.  None.  Now the thought of not recalling someone's name seems like a step up.  Anyway, this lovely woman could tell from the blank look on my face that I had not a clue.  She explained that we'd met at Costco.  It all came back to me.  She sat down next to us in the food court and went on and on about how Ben just continually made her day with his friendliness and his smile.

Once I was oriented, I told her (her name is Kathleen), about how Ben has been struggling this year.  She told me the guys she typically sees Ben with and one guy she has tried to set up with Ben.  It made me feel as if all along, Ben has had this angel looking out for him.  I wanted to ask her, "Did Ellie send you?"