Little Balls of Love

A few weeks ago, I volunteered in Zibbi's kindergarten class.  In previous years, I have tried to volunteer with a younger sibling (or two) in tow, with extremely limited success.  I even speculate that after the disruption I caused one year that the school district actually changed the policy so no younger siblings are allowed during volunteering. (Sorry!) I know, the world doesn't actually revolve around me, it just feels like it sometimes.  Even though I don't actually have any younger children with me now, I was feeling nervous about volunteering.  Zibbi's teacher said she needed help running "literacy" stations (which Zibbi had been calling "little c" stations.  She was disgusted with us, when we asked if she was learning letters at "little c" stations.  She already KNOWS the letters...)  Before I volunteered, I took a deep breath and made the intention to spread some joy in the kindergarten class room.  As I was leaving, a crowd of 5-6 year-olds surrounded me, asking for hugs.  One of Zibbi's favorite friends requested a hug and told me she wished I was her mom.  I was both flattered and shocked.  I know her two moms and after the initial flattery wore off, I wondered how many moms did she need!?!?  Was she trying to collect moms? Another little girl gave me a big hug, then paused.  She exclaimed, "How do you SMELL SO good??"  I also wasn't expecting that comment.  Leaving the school, I had that feeling that I had failed on my mission of spreading joy.  Instead, those little bundles of love left me covered in joy.

Black Face

We have been a flurry of home projects as of late.  Fourteen years worth of ideas are FINALLY starting to come to light.  One project, I worked on last week was spray painting doors to cover Benja's closet black. I thought I'd put all my project items away.  Then Sunday morning as I'm cleaning the kitchen, Zibbi suddenly screams out in surprise and panic and pain.  I look over and she has the spray paint can in her hand and she'd pushed the button.  Unfortunately, the can was pointed towards her face, so paint was in her eyes, on her cheek, chin, neck.  My immediate thought, was "OMG she looks like we were trying to do a "black face" thing, this is NOT a good look, now or ever."  Quickly, I grabbed a wash cloth and started rubbing off the paint, while shouting for Thom at the same time.  Luckily, we were able to get all the paint off around her eye. And after a LOOONG DEEP bath (her favorite kind), most of the paint was off.  There's still a bit on her neck that looks like she's been rolling in the dirt, just as a reminder to put my supplies away. 

Distractions

Face painting reactivated Zibbi's smile...

After flooding last month, Madison has become a swamp land.  The Mosquito population is completely thriving, even in the morning.  Not our usual for September.  Sunday was the Wish Walk, not only was it already warm in the morning, did I mention the mosquitoes?  Holy moly, they adore Zibbi and I worry they may just fly off with her...As we registered for the walk, one of the volunteers mentioned that mascots were on hand.  Zibbi is TERRIFIED of mascots, so she immediately burst into tears and hid herself.  To distract Zibbi, I suggested we create a bracelet.  On a table next to us, were bowls filled with bracelets that read, "I wish to go..." OR "I wish to be..." So everyone could imagine and share what wish they would request, if they had a wish granted.  Zibbi told me she wanted "I wish to go..." and when I inquired what I should write, she said, "home"...so much for my distraction techniques. 

It's the THOUGHT...

On a Saturday recently, when everyone woke up, Benja proudly proclaimed how he'd been up for hours.  I inquired if he'd made us all breakfast (since he is into cooking right now).  He paused and said, "I thought about it, but I didn't.  But you know, it's the THOUGHT that counts..."  Now we use that excuse for EVERYTING.  I THOUGHT about doing laundry, but I didn't.  Even though you have no clean clothes, it's the THOUGHT that counts....I feel like his Improv camp is really paying off. 

Frenemies for Life....

To celebrate Benja turning 13, we went to see Hamilton in Chicago.  Since then, we have been all Hamilton music, all the time.  There's a song where Hamilton talks about his frenemy (friend + enemy) Aaron Burr.  After a listening, Zibbi told me that Lotta is HER frenemy.  I thought that was pretty an accurate assessment, their loving playtimes can so quickly turn violent, before there is even time to respond.  Then, Zibbi sighed and said, "And I have to LIVE with my frenemy..."

You are Beautiful

As many mornings as we've been able, Lotta, Zibbi and I have biked to school.  The fresh morning air and bright blue skies are a big incentive.   Along the way, there is a billboard that reads, "You are beautiful".  A recent morning I commented to Lotta how some people do not feel beautiful, and so this billboard was extremely important at reminding anyone feeling ugly that they are beautiful.  Lotta seemed shocked that anyone would feel less than beautiful.  I think she may have even had a very Ellie like "really".  She pondered this for a moment and asked if I thought more women than men felt less than beautiful.  I agreed that this seemed to be the case.  My hope for future Lotta is that she continues to feel beautiful, and flaunt her own signature style, and that even the thought of not feeling beautiful is shocking.  Today Lotta decided to wear as many jewels to summer school as she could. 

A Nocturnal Party Animal

Almost every evening, unless she is ill, Zibbi suddenly gets a super huge burst of energy as soon as the

lights are out.  She will then check outside to see how dark it is.  Get another drink of water.  Practice some yoga moves, do some burpees and other exercises.  Fall off of the bed.  Walk around the room.  Scratch her many itches.  Suddenly urgently, need to have a lengthy discussion about a random topic.

Recently, I decided to try out a Loving Kindness Meditation on her to see if it would help her calm more quickly.  In the first step, you close your eyes and send "loving-kindness to yourself".  Zibbi immediately said she was going to send loving-kindness to her "bigger" self.  It struck me what a fantastic idea this was, as a 4-year-old, she is so very in love with herself right now.  At four, she's able to be courageous in ways she may not in the future.  And I know some time in the future, she will have challenging moments when she will not feel so freely loving of herself.  What a beautiful package to send to her future self, some love and some kindness.  I hope that her future self feels that "thrown" loving kindness when she needs it most.