[/caption]My friend Wendy is turning 40 on Sunday, November 23. This blog is dedicated to her and all that she has added to our life. Wendy (or Maude as she would prefer to be called) is the kind of friend my sister told me about. The kind of friend who is allowed to enter your home without knocking, at some point you just get past the whole knocking thing.
During our whole summer of crazy, Wendy stood firmly by our sides. She never flinched at our crazy moments, but just let them pass and move on. (OK, maybe an occasional eye roll or slight flinch, but who could blame her?) When others dropped us because they couldn't take all the crying or screaming, Wendy stood by our side. When others ran from our home, Wendy continued to come to our house for oh so crazy, LOUD playdates. She was not dissuaded by the crazy that had temporarily taken residence of our home.
The first time I met Wendy was at bookclub. She was telling the group how frustrated she was at making friends in her new town of Middleton (right next door to Madison and voted best city of the year by Money Magazine. I guess not best city at being able to make friends easily, however.) I decided right then and there that we would be friends.
It would be a toss up deciding who in my family loves Wendy most. Every single time Wendy comes over, Ellie talks and talks and talks about how much fun we had and wonders when Wendy & Max (her adorable son) can come again. Thom said he likes that Wendy keeps me entertained, so he doesn't have to.
When Wendy was pregnant with Max, she would come over at least once a week to read and hang out with Ellie. This was most helpful to me as it gave me time to hang out with the then Baby Ben without feeling as if I were completely ignoring Ellie.
When Ellie was in the hospital last spring, Wendy often took Ben for the day so that Thom could sleep or go to the office while I went to the hospital to stay with Ellie. She told me that she was practicing for when Max would be a toddler. Afterwards, she would tell me that Ben would do things that really made sense to a 3-year-old, but maybe not to anybody else. I knew then that Ben was in good hands because Wendy was thinking where Ben was coming from, not where she wanted Ben to come from. And Ben was so proud to be spending time with his buddy Max and his friend, Wendy. If she saw that it would be easier for us if she dropped Ben off at home or at the hospital she would do that even if it was NOT at all easier for her. And she never ever acted as if she were doing us a big favor, even though she was completely.
Around Halloween Wendy phoned and Ben asked to speak with her. Ben asked Wendy what she was going to be for Halloween. Wendy responded by telling Ben what Max was going to be for Halloween, to which Ben responded by asking again what Wendy was going to be. Ben doesn't just think of Wendy as his buddy Max's mommy, he thinks of Wendy as his friend too. He likes her hugs most of all.
Top things I like about Wendy:
1. Humor
Her sense of humor. If I tell a Senfield joke, she gets it. Not everyone gets those references. It is important. She loves to laugh and she is quick witted. Honestly, I am not sure if I could be good friends with someone who didn't have a good sense of humor. Serious in any long term way just doesn't work for me.
2. Mothering
She is a fantastic mom. You can tell she adores Max, even when she's annoyed with him you can see her love shining through. That's saying something. She is understanding when I am striving to be the mom that I want to be but I am not in that moment.
3. Listening
She really listens. I mean really listens as if what I am saying is of the utmost importance. When I was telling her recently how Ellie has trouble if she starts thinking of things as "twins" if those objects are separated from one another. It feels obsessive, as if Ellie is stuck in some kind of thought circle that she can't climb out of . Wendy nodded her head as if, first of all, what I was saying was actually interesting and, second of all, as if she understood what I was saying. Man, how wonderful to be understood by someone.
4. Intelligence
She is intelligent. When I told her that Ellie might not be cerebral salt wasting anymore, she said "Yeah", as if I'd already told her this information. Startled, I asked her if I'd already told her about that, because I didn't think I'd told anyone. She told me that when she looked up cerebral salt wasting it made sense to her that it would end after Ellie's surgery. I mean a friend that is actually INTERESTED in all of this medical mumbo jumbo, are you kidding me? On her own time, she looked up Ellie's myriad of medical conditions just because she wanted to know. As Mary Poppins before her, she is practically perfect in every way.
5. Memory
She will remember all those trivial details of what I like and don't like even after I've forgotten. I like that she is thoughtful enough to recall these details. It's not earth-shattering but it makes me feel important.
6. PJ comofortable
I love being around Wendy because I can just be myself. I can be pjs or sweats. I don't have to always be shiny (although I often am if she is around). I can sometimes be grumpy or sleepy or hungry or impatient and she will still be there. She might look at me funny, but she will not run screaming from my house. To me, right now, that is probably the most important characteristic of a friend.
Our lives certainly would not be as sunny funny without our superb friend, Wendy. Happy birthday, Wendy. You make 40 look fantastic!
Happy Birthday to Wendy the Wonderful!! I agree with everything you said, Deb. She IS wonderful and I always feel blessed to spend time with her. I appreciate all she has done and is doing for you and your family and am so glad that she moved from the Big Apple to Best City so that we could know and love her.
ReplyDeleteFriends like Wendy make the world go around! I am so glad she is in your family's life.
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